Sad news

Well I wasn't sure when I was going to blog about this or if I was going to even at all, but I figure this is more my journal and I need to write about everything. Even sad things. At the same time we found out that Lee's sister Shanna was pregnant, we found out that I was as well. I was a week late and kept taking pregnancy tests and they all kept saying No. I really didn't feel pregnant but I thought it was possible. On Sunday I took a test in the morning and it said No again. So I just went on with my day. Later that night Lee saw the test sitting on top of the trash and says "You might want to come see this" and I was like "Oh whatever Lee don't trick me like that" (he has pulled that one on me before) and he was like "No really" so I go in and there is faint positive line. So we decided to go buy another pregnancy test to double check. I took it that night and yep Pregnant. I had a lot of concerns and doubts and I felt very unsettled. Not about getting pregnant or having another child but I felt like something was wrong. I don't know why but I guess I didn't have any symptoms or feelings and I just didn't "feel" it. I told Lee that I didn't want to say anything until we heard the heartbeat and knew for sure because I thought something was wrong. I kept trying to push it out of my mind and telling myself that my body just knew I was pregnant so I didn't have any symptoms like last time. I can't even explain the feeling I had. I was happy I was pregnant, we have been wanting another baby but I just didn't feel right about it. Anyways I get on with it, call the doctor and set up the first appt. My due date was April 19.
Then Wednesday happened. I was about 6 weeks. I woke up and was doing our usual morning routine of getting Owen breakfast and playing and all that fun stuff and I thought I felt something. I went to the bathroom and there was blood. I thought it might be "implantation bleeding" because it was really light. I immediately called the doctor and they told me that might be what it was but to come in that afternoon for an ultrasound to double check. As the day went on, I just knew that I had miscarried. There was too much blood and I knew that there was no baby. Lee took the afternoon off and we went in and got the ultrasound. I kept hoping that it was just one of those fluke accidents and everything was fine, but I knew deep down, like I knew from the beginning that everything was not fine and there was no baby anymore.
Even though I knew something was wrong, I still have had a hard time with it. I cried a lot that day but I know it was for the best. I feel almost relieved because I knew something was off but it is still a loss and it still hurts. I keep thinking "maybe I worked out too hard" or "I shouldn't have taken that Ibuprofen" or "what did I do wrong" etc, etc. I know there is nothing I did or could have done and it was probably something wrong with the baby. But I think everyone that miscarries or has complications thinks things like this. I feel like I was just waiting for this to happen. I knew I was going to miscarry at some point or another. I am glad that it was this early so I didn't have to get any surgery or anything.
The funny thing about this is that it was our first month trying and we got pregnant our first month with Owen so I know that we will be able to conceive again. The doctor wants me to wait a while to go through a regular cycle or two then we can try again. I also know that down the road when we do get pregnant and have another that I wouldn't have that child if I hadn't miscarried this time. I am trying to stay positive. I am so thankful for my family and friends that knew and were so loving and supportive.
So I guess the cat's out of the bag. Yes, we want another baby and yes, we are going to try after a month or two. Hopefully everything goes well and we are able to conceive quickly and everything will "stick". I hope in a few months I have some Good News!

Cecret Lake

As promised, here are the pics from our hike up to Cecret Lake. So gorgeous! Even though I ended up carrying Owen almost the entire time!





Owen also mastered the drums at Rockband! haha. My friend had a Rockstar birthday party and we all dressed up and played rockband. It was so fun! And lastly, I got a Tattoo! Here it is....A Henna Tattoo that is, it has faded away and left me now, but one of my best friends got married and had all her bridesmaids get henna tattoos of this heart on their left feet. It was fun while it lasted! :)

Time to catch up a bit...

Oh man, it is so hard for me to keep up my blog this summer, I don't know why!? Well here is a rundown:
Our basement got fixed, HOA paid for everything and it is all back to normal.
I got diagnosed with Basal Cell Skin Cancer (NOT melanoma and not deadly). I go in this Thursday to get it cut out.
Owen started to fold his arms when we say time to Pray. It is THE cuteste thing ever. Of course we say quick family prayers and he doesn't stay that way, only for like 2.5 seconds, but he is starting to learn so much! What a cutie pie pants!
Lee got me the bodybugg!! WOO! It is what is used on the biggest loser. It is basically an armband that over 90% accurately calculates how many calories you are burning. I wear it on my left arm and I have a watch that tells me my calorie count, how many steps I have taken and my activity level. Then I go online and input all my food and it shows exactly how many calories I am under or over. I have a goal to be 800 calories defecit so I lose approximately 1.55 pounds per week. It is seriously so awesome and I love it and I wear it every single second! It also tells you what kind of food you should be eating and the breakdown and all this other cool stuff. I am so excited about it, yesterday I lost a total of over 3000 calories (the whole entire day from midnight to midnight) and walked over 13000 steps. It helps that I went to 2 aerobics classes but hey.
Lee's older sister Shanna out in Virginia is Pregnant!! Yea! I get to be an aunt again! I love babies so much and I wish she lived closer so we could see them more often. But it is still exciting. This is only the 3rd grandchild on the Jacobs side so we are all ecstatic!
A few weeks ago I went on a hike with my mom and Aunt and Owen, Keaton and Cambry. It was so beautiful! I have such gorgeous pics and Owen was such a cutie, I will post those pics in a later post. We went to Cecret Lake, there were so many wildflowers I felt like I was in Sound of Music running through hills of wildflowers! ha!
Sorry to be such a slacker, I will try to be better about updating more.

Flooded basement!

Whoa! What a crazy day I had on Tuesday....so I went down to the basement to run on our treadmill and I noticed our window wells had water in them so I start walking to them and squish wet carpet! It didn't look too bad yet so I opened the bathroom door and whaddyaknow...about an inch of water. As I investigated further, the water was in our water heater room, our closet and down the hall in spots! So we called our HOA and the guy came out and we found out the sprinkler right by our house had broken so water was leaking in! This was at about 11 am so he was going to call the maintenance guy to fix it.
Fast forward to 5:00 PM and many calls to our HOA...still no maintenance guy and still water leaking into our basement. The longer it stays broken the more damage the water is going to do. Luckily they did come a little bit later after that and fix it.
Our HOA has been so good about everything. They told me it was their issue so they were going to pay for it and get it fixed so that same night a restoration company called me and set up an appt to come out today and they came out and sucked up the water and cut out the wet mat underneath our carpet and laid the carpet out with fans to dry. They then set up an appt on Saturday to come out and put in a new mat and relay the carpet and double check for mold. So luckily, the bad situation isn't too bad and is being taken care of, let's hope it stays that way!