worried

I am a mess. I am not going to lie. I am literally freaking out. I hate feeling this way. Calvin is 10 weeks old today and still no smile. Everything I read says 4-6 weeks and it is over a month past due. It may not seem like a big deal but the reason I am so worried is because that is a sign of autism. He also doesn't hold eye contact very long. He sleeps at least 20 out of the 24 hours so he doesn't get much interaction. I don't know what to do. I want to wake him up every second and play with him and get him to be happy and social and smile. I am so worried because I just love him with all my heart. It kills me that there is nothing I can do but sit here day in, day out and wait. I am such an anxious person and I want to know that it will all be ok. But I don't. He probably is fine. At least that is what everyone is saying. But when you are the mother, it is so hard to look at your precious baby and wait for him to develop like all the other babies. I love him and no matter what happens, I will always love him. It is just so hard to wait. I over analyze everything and obsessively worry about him literally every second. The worst part is that I just have to sit here and wait, wait, wait.
Please, keep my little baby in your prayers.

Baby haircut

Calvin is starting to get a bald spot on the back of his head. Today as I was holding him and playing with him Owen came up and inspected the back of his head. He then got a distressed look and said "Oh no, baby haircut".

2 months old

Calvin turned 2 months old today! Wow, really? That has flown by. He is such a cutie and brings me so much joy and happiness. The little stinker isn't smiling yet but any day now...kinda makes me worried, but I am trying not to compare him to Owen. I take him to his appt monday so we will see exactly how much he has grown. Here he is! Such a big cute chunker! I just LOVE him!!! I love babies faces, they just really have no clue and it makes me laugh. I tried to get some of me and my boys and of course Owen had to kiss Calvin. I seriously didn't know that kids could make you so happy.
Post Edit: Took him to his appt. He weighed 13 lbs exactly! (75%) and height was 22.75 (50%)

summer fun

We have seriously had the craziest summer. Life is awesome. Owen has decided that he needs to come in our room and try to get in bed with us EVERY night. Then he wakes up at 6 and immediately says "mommy go get baby". He is so in love with Calvin it is outta control. He wants to kiss him and pet him every second. It is funny because when I am holding Calvin and talking to him and giving him attention, Owen tries to out-do me and comes up and starts kissing his head a million times and saying "hi baby boy". It can get a little annoying when he won't stop or when Cal is sleeping but I am just grateful he is being such a loving brother. Owen is starting to talk so good and he makes me laugh the things he does and says. Sometimes, he doesn't make me laugh like yesterday we were in the kitchen eating a snack when Lee texted me and asked me to put his clothes in the wash. Of course being the perfect wife I got right up and immediately did it. As I was finishing, Owen came upstairs and said "Owen turn. Hot. Turn, turn, hot". His hand was also mimicking him turning a knob. I asked him "What did you turn Owen? Did you turn on the oven?" and he said "Oven, turn, hot". When I got downstairs, you better believe he pushed his chair to the stove and turned on one of the burners. Luckily he didn't touch it and he knows it is hot and not to touch it. I tell you what, that little boy catches on the everything. His little eyes pick up everything!
Anyways, we have been having fun playing this summer! Owen sure loves his friends. He is obsessed with his swimming suit and wears it almost every day. We bought him a little pool and our neighbors have a slide we put in it. Then our other neighbors bought a slip n slide that we put on the hill by our house. Every evening is a party here! haha. To top it off, we have all sorts of toys in front of our house and his wagon and bike and sidewalk chalk...well sometimes I feel like our house looks like the ghetto house of the neighborhood with all the stuff but I guess it just shows that Owen is having a great summer. (we hired a great decorator to draw all over our door with chalk. If anyone wants to hire him, he charges $100 a door) Calvin still sleeps like 90% of the time so next summer he can enjoy it. I just love summer and am not looking forward to it ending!
Here is Owen throwing one of his many, famous, super fun, temper tantrum fits. I don't know what it was about but someday I will show him this and tell him I hope he has a son just like him! haha :) jk I LOVE this boy, it just makes me laugh!

Haircut

What a big handsome boy he is becoming!

Independence day part 2

I love our neighborhood. After the blessing, we decided to have a neighborhood bbq and firework show. It was a lot of fun. We ended up with a lot of families coming over and had a really good time! We need to do one again soon! Here is our front yard and everyone watching the fireworks.
Of course, the boys would be the ones closest to the fireworks!
Me and Owen. He is the happiest boy ever. He just LOVES fireworks! 100% pure boy, he is.

Baby Blessing

We celebrated Independence day in a very special way...we blessed our beautiful baby boy Calvin! He looked so handsome in his white tux. It even had little coat tails. ADORABLE! Lee did an absolutely wonderful job. I love to see our family growing. After the blessing, we came back to our house and had banana splits and root beer floats. And that was only the first party of the night...stay tuned...Calvin, Audrey and Emma. Remember this picture?
Well, our little basketballs have all arrived and here they are back together for the first time! So cute. Audrey was born May 5, Calvin May 17 and Emma June 6! I love having babies with friends! :)

Monsters coming

A few nights ago I woke up at 3:30 in the morning to a little foot kicking me in the back. Owen had come in our room and gotten in bed with us without either Lee or I knowing and was sleeping with us. I decided to just let him stay.

Fast forward to the next day. Owen and Calvin were both napping so I decided to get on my treadmill. I left the door to the basement open and the light on so in case Owen woke up he would know I was down there. Sure enough, when he got up he came and found me. I started to head up the stairs and Owen started crying chasing after me saying "Monsters coming".

hmmm. Maybe this is why he got in bed with us the night before.

Time to sharpen the pitch forks.

boys, boys, boys

Life is getting crazier by the day! But I do love it. Owen just loves being a brother and just adores Calvin...a little too much if you ask me but he loves to kiss him and wants to hug him all the time. He tries to hold him but I don't let him. In fact, last Sunday Calvin was laying on the floor kicking and looking around and Lee and I were in the kitchen talking and Owen said "hold baby" so we looked over to see Owen holding Calvin. He had wrapped both his hands around his waist so Calvin was just drooping in his arms. We both said "Put the baby down" and I started running over there just in time to see him "put the baby down" by dropping him. Luckily it was a short fall and both boys are still fine. We should not have told him to put him down but that was our first instinct. I know Owen was just trying to love him and hold him and that is just something I gotta expect when I have a 2 year old and a newborn.
We finally took Calvin to church at 6 weeks old. He looked adorable! Man I know how to make good looking kids! :) Here he is all handsomed up for church! SOOOO Cute!
Calvin is funny in that he does not like to be swaddled. Since day 1 he sticks his legs straight out so they don't curl up and then he fights until his arms are free. Here he is fighting his way out. haha
Calvin is definitely growing and not looking like a newborn so much anymore. Makes me so sad but he just gets cuter every day. Any day now he should start smiling so hopefully that happens soon.
He hates his binky but is doing pretty good without one. He sleeps pretty good usually from around 8-9 pm till around 3-4 in the morning then again till 6 then sleeps till 8 or 9. So technically he is only waking up once. He is in his own crib and has been for about a week or so. I sleep so much better and feel more relaxed not having to tiptoe around at night. He is being a champ and I think he likes looking at his bumper pad in his crib.
He just has the cutest little face that I want to kiss every second!
Owen is being Owen. Wanting to play every second, throwing fits, waking up at 6 am and wanting to go see the baby, throwing fits, playing outside, throwing fits...did I mention he is throwing fits? haha jk but really, I am so ready for the terrible 2's to be over with. Literally, he comes running in our room 6 in the morning bright eyed and ready to run! He wants to go outside and play with his water toy so I usually sit on our porch in my pajamas while he plays in the sprinklers or the water toy at like 8 am. We have a few neighbor friends that come out a lot too so usually he has a friend to play with him. Yesterday he was being just wild. Seriously, I NEEDED a break. I would have given anyone 100 dollars to just take him for a few hours. I had a lot I needed to do and he kept throwing fits if he didn't get his way and then when I got him happy it was time to feed Calvin or whatnot. Anyways, I was getting so frustrated with him so I told him I just wanted to go drop him off at the funny farm (I don't know what that is but it sure sounds a lot better than what I really wanted to say). Anyways, he got really excited and ran in his room and grabbed his shirt and shorts and brought them to me saying "farm, farm". poor kid just wanted to be dropped off at the funny farm.
I am finding that I am getting really busy and hardly have time to do anything that needs to get done. Our house is always a disaster, I can barely sneak in showers (I don't bother doing my hair or makeup because that is just out of the question). I forgot how much work babies are and to add the craziest, wildest 2 year old on top...well, we have a fun, fast paced life. I really do love being a mom to 2 kids. To be honest, I like it more than 1. Even though it is crazier and harder, I am feeling more complete. I don't know why, I just feel like my family is coming together and I feel so happy that Owen and Calvin have each other.